Sometimes

Sometimes I wonder when exactly life will get easy.
Because I look at some people and they have had it coming to them their whole lives.
Like the good stuff is supposed to be just around the bend for them.
But then things get tighter and slowly loosen again and then tighten back up.
Its like their life is a constant up and down of blessings and curses thrown at them.
But do you know what I have noticed about those people?
They can love like nobody else.
Now I mean these people are mommy's and daddy's and sister's and brother's to everyone around them.
What is it about those people who have been to hell and back again that make them so loving?
Is it the heat of their lives that have just burned up all of the imperfections?
So many people ask me why God let's bad things happen to good people and that is the only answer I have ever found.
For some people that isn't enough but it's all I've got tonight so I hope it'd enough for you.
Because those people who have been to hell and back a few times know that life is life and it is an up and down kind of a cycle and you just have to roll with it.
They tell me that life is too short.
I'm not sure for what but that is what they tell me.

Who likes beards?

I decided I like food that's bad for me.
And I don't care if that's bad because I like it and I'm not afraid to say it.
That sounds silly but my saying that is freeing because for too long I said what I thought would make other people think highly of me.
I rounded down my weight if asked, I subtracted two or three from my actual size, I even pretended to like things I hated and hate things I liked.
Now I hate to say that I did those things to be cool but if I deny it I'm lying.
Yes, I succumbed to the pressure to fit in.
So now I'm taking a stand.
I like fast food.
I am a size 12 or 14.
I love stupid movies.
I am roughly one hundred and eighty five pounds.
I can't carry a tune.
I love to sing anyway.
You see I'm finished trying to be someone that people like, so from now on I'm going to do my best to tell the truth fearlessly.
I think today's society is messed up.
I think that House is right when he says that everybody lies.
But you don't have to and neither do I.
There shouldn't be any shame in being who you are.
The thing is that I really doubt that if I told everyone that I'm a size 13 that they would look at me any differently than if I lied and said I was a size 10 but I think we all have a fear of being rejected for who they are.
Let's stop being afraid let's stand together in truth and accept our friends for who God made them and who they have become.
Let's stop judging and start caring.
If everyone held their tongue once for every two times they were going to say something insulting everyone would be 50% less scared to say who they really are.
Because it is the amount of times you are hurt that determine how open you are going to be.
So shut your mouth to insults and open your mouth to truth and see how far you get.
I think it's time to be real and stop acting, there are people who get paid for that, leave it to them.

green shoes

Holes in the sides.
Worn in from life.
The vibrant color only slightly faded from the years of wear and tear.
By looking at them you can tell that slipping them on your feet would feel like coming home.
Its like they have soul(no not the kind every shoe has I do believe that is spelt differently).
No they hold memories and stories inside them.
All you have to do is put them on and its like you never wore another shoe in your whole life.
Or would ever want to again for that matter.
Never be ashamed to wear your green shoes.

My List

Recently I watched a very amusing movie with one of my favorite actors Morgan Freeman.
In this movie the two protagonists decide to make a list of things to do before "kicking the bucket" and I really liked this idea, however at age 16 it seems a little grim to make a list of things to do before I die so I will just make a list of this I want to do this year.
MY LIST

1. Kiss someone like I mean it(see the bottom of the list)
   
2. Take a walk all day(alone)
3. Create a masterpiece
4. Spend at least 5 weeks away from home
5. Let someone else(besides Maeg)read something I've written(other than this)
6. Do something really hard(hike a big mountain, swim a lake, or kayak something really swift)
7. See what I consider a wonder
8. Let go of my regrets